In its effort,
decided to walk.
In its effort,
In its effort,
decided to walk.
There were words,
with the changing of the magnets
in the dim lights,
with 4 and 10,
on the (intentional) accident
and not one,
like local news
and the grain,
against the grain,
shattering on the ground
in solitary confinement,
and battles rage,
and magnets change,
and battles rage
the lions roar,
but a cage is built
the hurricane blows,
but the building stands
the grain is changed,
and bread is eaten
and magnets change,
among it all.
then a question,
a magnifying glass,
the words of others,
the lawyers stand,
a speech is given,
but by the sea,
it is unknown.
The magnets change,
and the magnets change,
and then a door,
This poem is about a husband and wife. It is about the husband’s negative treatment of his wife and how that and their relationship progresses with time. The poem is divided into four sections.
The first section describes the husband’s mistreatment of his wife. He is verbally abusive (There were words, and words) and this has been something that has gone on for some time (with the changing of the magnets – magnets refers to refrigerator calendar magnets, the changing of which signifies the progression of time).
In addition to this constancy, there have also been a number of negative incidents. An example is given in the second stanza.
The stanza describes a party after a wedding (far off, in the dim lights, with 4 and 10 – far off means they traveled, in the dim lights signifies the party, and with 4 and 10 represents that a DJ is there (D is the fourth letter of the alphabet and J is the tenth)).
At the party, the husband has an incident where he embarrasses and mistreats his wife. It is an awkward noticeable moment (the spotlight, on the (intentional) accident). The husband’s behavior is like a car accident in that people at the wedding can’t help but notice, but it is intentional behavior, which is unlike an accident.
This isn’t the only incident like this the husband has had. His behavior has been this way over and over. It is like the mention of accidents on the local news (and not one, but many, like local news).
In addition to all this, the husband drinks (and the grain – grain signifying alcohol). His drinking negatively affects his behavior (against the grain) and like a bottle shattering on the ground it leads to negative bursts in his behavior.
All of these things continue (and words, and accidents, and grains) until finally his wife leaves him (alone).
The next section starts after the But.
When the man is alone (in solitary confinement) he begins to feel his conscience (silence whispers). This starts an internal struggle within himself (and battles rage) that is unseen by others.
This struggle takes time (and magnets change, and battles rage), but eventually the man repents.
He learns to control what he says (the lions roar, but a cage is built), he stops having outburst in public (the hurricane blows, but the building stands) and he stops drinking (the grain is changed, and bread is eaten).
As time changes (and the magnets change) so does the man (among it all).
The next section starts after the And.
The wife learns of her husband’s change (a learning). She questions its reality (then a question). She examines his behavior (a magnifying glass, held up) and questions her feelings (and down – as in she is looking down through the magnifying glass at herself).
The friends and family of the woman speak to her about the situation (the words of others). They speak against the man and the sincerity of his change (the lawyers stand). They give what amounts to a collective speech against him (a speech is given). The woman though is unsure of herself and what she should do (but by the sea, it is unknown).
The poem ends with ambiguity. In the last section of the poem, time has passed (The magnets change, and the magnets change). The man checks in different ways to see if his wife will come back to him (and then a door, does open). The poem though, ends with just the door opening. It doesn’t say if the wife is on the other side when it does.
P. S. If you like explained poems, please consider purchasing a copy of M. Sakran’s self-published eBook, Understanding: poems with explanations.
Above is an artwork of a meal. A meal can be art. The meal is couscous with garbanzo beans, peppers, mushrooms and bok choy. Additional ingredients include vegetable oil, salt, red pepper flakes, dried dill and water.
The meal was prepared by sautéing the peppers, mushrooms and bok choy in the vegetable oil along with the salt, red pepper flakes and dried dill. Partway through the cooking, the garbanzo beans were added. When all that was near done, the couscous was stirred in and then water was added. The pan everything was in was covered and the couscous was allowed to steam in the water.
This artwork can inspire poetry. Here are some ideas:
Two ideas that may come up in writing poetry, is whether poetry should be nonfiction or fiction and whether it should be personal or impersonal.
There are four categories that could be made. Poetry could be personal nonfiction, impersonal nonfiction, personal fiction or impersonal fiction.
Personal nonfiction is the type of poetry where a poet writes about something they have, are or will experience. A poet writes about something real from their own perspective. Examples might include, a poet writing about a disease they have or a poet writing about some experience, like moving to a new place. Additionally, a poet could write about a real experience that someone they personally know is going through, doing so from their own perspective.
Impersonal nonfiction, is where a poet writes about something real, without a fictional backdrop, but the thing they are writing about does not personally affect them. Good examples of this type of poetry, would be poetry about social issues or poetry about current events. For example, a poet might write about homelessness, without themselves or someone they know being homeless. If they do it in a way that doesn’t include a fictional homeless person, for example, but rather simply talks about the issue, the poetry would fit into this category.
Personal fiction poetry, is where a poet writes about something that affects them, but with a fictional story element. For example, a poet might write a poem that is a fictional conversation between themselves and a dead relative. The main framework is fictional, but there are some realistic elements, and the poetry is personal to the poet. Another example might be metaphorical poetry, where a poet uses a story element to talk about something that has a reality basis in their lives.
Impersonal fiction poetry, is where a poet writes about something that does not personally affect them, and they use a story element as the vehicle. For example, if a poet writes a poem about a person who is homeless, but the poet isn’t homeless and doesn’t know anyone who is, then the poetry would fit into this category.
There are a number of issues to consider when deciding what type of poetry to write, and in evaluating the merits of each kind of poetry.
Personal nonfiction poetry
Personal nonfiction poetry can be good in that it allows a poet a direct vehicle for expression. The poet writes about something in their lives in an overt way.
This type of poetry has the benefit of being real to an audience. If a person writes poetry about a condition, and they have that condition, and their audience knows it, it can give their poetry authenticity. It avoids possible situations of disillusionment.
Another benefit, is that since this type of poetry is a real description of something personal, the poet doesn’t have to invent something. They don’t have to invent situations, or characters, or metaphorical vehicles. They simply have to talk about something real.
There are some drawbacks to this kind of poetry. One is, since the poetry is personal nonfiction, the poet is putting part of themselves out there. There is a sense of vulnerability involved. Depending on the content of the poetry, it might be the equivalent of the poet letting others read their diary. This is the kind of thing, that later on, a poet might regret.
A second drawback, is that if this is the primary kind of poetry a poet writes, it can be limiting. If a poet only writes about things that have affected them, and they only do so in a real way, then they miss out on poetry about a wide variety of issues and topics. Using the example from above, if a poet wants to explore the issue of homelessness, but they nor no one they know has been or is homeless, then they would not be able to do so, if they only wrote using this type of poetry.
A third drawback, is that to some, personal nonfiction poetry can come across as “basic” in a way. It is the first type of poetry a poet might write. It can be narrowly focused and miss out on talking about “big” issues. This characteristic can make the poetry seem simplistic to some readers of poetry.
Impersonal nonfiction poetry
Impersonal nonfiction poetry can be useful in a number of ways. For example, it can be used to explore “big” issues. A poet can talk about current events or history or social issues and do so even if those things have not personally affected the poet. Although this type of poetry can be focused on small things, when it is focused on big ideas, it can be poetry that a wide audience can take something from (whether they agree with the poet’s perspective or not).
Also, this type of poetry, although impersonal, because of its nonfiction element, doesn’t have the problem of being perceived as disingenuous. For example, if a poet wrote about war, without a fictional story element, it could be seen as the poet writing about an important issue. This could be the case, even if the poet has never been personally affected by a war, for example by never having been a soldier or someone who knows one. By contrast, if a poet were to write about war, but did so from the perspective of a grieving loved one who has lost someone in a war, if this isn’t personally them, or someone they know, they could come across as disingenuous to their audience. This might be the case, even if the poet was simply using the fictional element to explore the issue or make a point.
One drawback to this kind of poetry, is that it might not be too expressive for the poet. Because the poet is writing about impersonal subjects, they might miss out on exploring elements of themselves. Even though the poet is talking about something real, because those things aren’t personal to them, they might miss out on elements of self-discovery.
Personal fiction poetry
Personal fiction poetry, if utilizing metaphor, has the benefit, that a poet gets to explore issues and ideas connected to themselves, but do so in a way that provides a barrier between them and their audience. It’s almost like wearing a costume and a mask in a play. It allows the person to express themselves, without necessarily being themselves.
If the poet writes about personal subjects in a fictional, but direct way, it can give the poet an opportunity to explore ideas that there is some lack of connection to. For example, a poet could write about themselves in a situation they have never really been in. This could allow the poet to explore the idea of how they would act, and also, how that situation might differ from their reality.
A drawback to this kind of poetry can come from the fictional element. Since the fiction is mixed with something personal, and therefore real, especially with the metaphorical type of this poetry, there might be some who find the poem “unreal” in some way. This is different from something that is either completely real or completely fiction. An analogy for this might be amateur wrestling vs. professional wrestling vs. a circus. Amateur wrestling could be viewed as real. A circus, which although is arranged, practiced and staged, might not be viewed as fake. Professional wrestling though, which is in an in between place, can be seen by some as “fake” because it straddles that middle line. This same idea could apply to personal fiction poetry.
Impersonal fiction poetry
Impersonal fiction poetry has the benefit of being very open. Because the poetry is completely made up, the poet can explore all sorts of issues. The poet isn’t limited to things that have actually happened or that have personally affected them.
This type of poetry can be a good way to talk about issues, because the story element allows the poet to explore the issue in a personal sounding way, even though the poetry is impersonal to the poet.
This type of poetry most closely resembles fiction story writing. If a writer is familiar with fiction writing, and wants to explore poetry, this type can be a way to do so. If a poet is familiar with fiction writing, this type of poetry can give the poet another outlet.
One drawback to this kind of poetry, is that since the poet is writing about things that haven’t affected them, they might not know the reality of the subject. If a poet hasn’t, for example, had cancer, they might have trouble writing a poem that expresses some aspect of it.
Another drawback, is the idea that this type of poetry might come across to some as without “right”. In other words, there might be some who think, “What right does a poet have to talk about an issue in a personal sounding way, if they haven’t been through it?” Using the example above, some might question a poet’s right to talk about cancer in a personal, emotional sounding way, if that poet, or someone they know, hasn’t had cancer. If someone has cancer, they might take some offense.
These four categories of poetry all have uses and can be used at different times and in different situations. Depending on what the poet wants to express, and how they want to express it, they can use one of the categories as a vehicle.
P. S. As tomorrow is Thanksgiving, there will be no new post on M. Sakran’s blog of and about poetry and poetry related things from November 23, 2017 – November 26, 2017. The next new post should be on Monday November 27, 2017. Happy Thanksgiving.
Above is a photograph of part of a squash plant. The focus of the photograph is part of the plant that is new and growing.
An important aspect of this plant is timing. The photograph was taken in late November. There is a chance that temperatures will get cold enough in the near future, such that this plant will die. Although the plant is attempting to grow and have fruit, there is a reasonable chance that it will fail because of circumstances that it can’t control.
This idea can be a metaphor for situations in life and can be used in poetry. A poet could write about situations where a person makes an effort to accomplish something, but because of the timing and other circumstances, there is a high chance they will fail.
Some ideas a poet could write about are:
Today’s experimental poetry form uses two poetic meters: trochaic and dactylic. The poem has one stanza with six lines. The odd lines use trochaic meter and the even lines use dactylic. The odd lines have three feet (for six syllables) and the even lines have two feet (also for six syllables). Here is how the form looks:
The stressed syllables are noted with an “*” and the unstressed syllables with a “.”.
Here is an example poem written in the form:
Seeking shelter nearby,
empty footsteps taken,
silent echoes seeking,
a movement of the line,
but the bait is gone.
un movimiento del sedal,
pero el cebo está ido.
Today’s poetry topic idea is commemoration. Many things can be commemorated in a person’s life. They might be personal (e.g. a person commemorates the day they started a business) or impersonal (i.e. a commemoration of an external event like the anniversary of a historical event).
A poet could write a poem where they commemorate something. They could also shift the perspective some and write about the commemoration itself. As mentioned above, they could write about personal or impersonal events.
Although commemorating might generally be seen as positive, a poet could shift the perspective and write about a commemoration from a negative point of view. They might write about the commemoration of a somber event. They might also write about a person or group who was negatively impacted by an event that is being commemorated (e.g. a town with a sports team might commemorate a championship, while they town with the team that got defeated for the championship might not celebrate). They might also write about someone with a negative emotion at an otherwise positive commemoration (i.e. an unhappy person at the party).
Here is an example poem that uses the idea of commemoration:
“This town was started,”
so the speech went,
“when all those years ago,
those determined pioneers,
who decided nothing would stop them,
no matter the cost,
decided this place,
would be a good spot,
after two wagons broke down,
and no one had,
did not align,
as forests grew,
and cardinals cried,
among blue jays.
the camels wandered,
among the sands,
as blind men spoke,
of what they could,
no longer see.
The flock of birds,
among the trees,
saw in the sand,
but none did call,
with words or songs.
in the sun,
during the night,
that would not end.
The camels wandered,
among the sands,
and over the hills,
This poem is about a man experiencing sadness after the death of his young daughter. His daughter died, some weeks before, and the man is struggling with everything.
In his sorrow, the man has lost track of time (The stars, did not align), he has stopped shaving (as forests grew), and often his clothes don’t match (and cardinals cried, among blue jays).
The man symbolically, and at times literally, stumbles as he moves forward in his life (Aimlessly, the camels wandered, among the sands). He keeps thinking of his daughter and can see her in his thoughts (as blind men spoke, of what they could, no longer see).
People who know the man (The flock of birds, among the trees), see his condition (saw in the sand, haphazard paths), but they don’t have the words to say to him (but none did call, with words or songs).
The man keeps thinking of his daughter, but her image in his mind is blurry (Mirages shimmered, in the sun) as it is overwhelmed with his sadness (during the night, that would not end).
The man aimlessly moves on with his life (The camels wandered, among the sands) and the condition he is in, seems unending (and over the hills, they disappeared).